Buffet strategy, part 2

If you read part 1, you know that the first thing you should do when you go to a buffet is to scope it out and plan your attack. You will notice at many establishments that they have different size plates; usually the appetizer, dessert, and sushi sections will have little plates, while hot entree sections have large plates.

Always get the big plate! Then you can fill it up, and save yourself a return trip. Less time walking from table to buffet = more time eating!

This here is Trent. We call him "Double Down".

Several months ago, KFC introduced the new Double Down: a "sandwich" consisting of bacon, cheese, and special sauce, between two pieces of boneless fried chicken.

Naturally, I had to have one.

I am here to tell you it is exactly as delicious and twice as disgusting as it sounds. Om nom nom nom.

Best. Day. Ever.

I was going to post Buffet Strategy, Part 2, today, but then this happened.

What you are looking at here is three cases of Charles Chocolate, who produces handmade artisan chocolates out of San Francisco. They are quite possibly the best chocolates I've ever had the pleasure of eating. And THEY ARE FREE* -- Charles just told us NOT to go to their store and buy chocolates anymore, because THEY WILL SEND US CHOCOLATES WHENEVER WE RUN OUT.

For serious, best day of work ever.

Buffet strategy, part 1

When you show up to a buffet, you probably think, "Yummy! Let's eat!" Rookie move, son. Your first move should be to scope it out and plan your attack. Buffets are made by evil men whose primary goal is to make sure you don't get your money's worth. Foil them by planning to eat meats, fish, and vegetables first, where they can settle in your tummy, and pasta, noodles, and rice last, because they expand and fill precious stomach space.

And remember: soup is for suckers.

Meat hangovers

When you are about to eat vast quantities of meat*, make sure you drink lots of water, or else you'll wake up in the morning feeling like you partied too hard, and you won't even have a funny story about molesting a streetlamp to show for it.